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needing the pain..........
needing the pain.......... BiPolyBabe is asking about pleasure and pain and how they are interconnected. i wrote these two blogs a while ago on pain and pleasure - one subjective, one the science of why it's such a turn on. [post 353645] and [post 352046] but it occurred to me that the question also ties back to Frankl's book - Man's Search for Meaning so, indulge me while i think aloud. i am a self proclaimed masochist and i crave pain. i seek it in a variety of ways but the most obvious is the sexual manifestation of this with my D. being restrained, being flogged, whipped, etc. are ways in which i move quickly into trance state and that amazing multi orgasmic tidal wave. but beyond that - there has always been a part of me that was pained by life or situations or by choice. i believe that in some way, i sought it out for my own purposes. enhancing the moments of joy by experiencing hate torment of suffering that precedes it. Frankl talks about suffering not as an end goal but as a fact of life. and that by giving that suffering some more cosmic or spiritual context in one's life, it allows one to suffer with purpose. and that makes the suffering endurable. he talks about man's need to find some meaning in their existence and that the lack of meaning causes oonological neuroses, separation from the world, depression. so is pain necessary? we all have read "when bad things happen to good people" and wondered at the plight of a friend, cursed the gods for the death of a loved one, etc. etc. in enduring these times, finding how they connect to your life, intertwine with your purpose and your existence, Frankl suggests that suffering is not only not something to deny, but more, something to embrace. that the suffering can and does lend meaning to one's life. the more simplistic view could be how do you know what joy is, if you haven't suffered despair? the need for a comparative reality is simplistic but useful. i meditate daily and i will sit on this tomorrow. but for now, my short answer is yes - pain is necessary You cannot conceive the many without the one. |
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8/10/2006 8:36 am |
It's all part of yin and yang. You don't learn and grow by getting it right...You grow and learn by getting it wrong...Sometimes that wrong can be pretty painful....We all have ways of experiencing intensity...for you, it appears bdsm plays an important role, for me it's a total mental connection. We both seem to be looking for the full feeling of life, we just might go about it in different ways, but still looking for the same result. Really thoughtful post. Thanks so much.
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8/10/2006 11:27 am |
Pain is part of life. I suppose I must have enough of it in my life in other areas because pain in a sexual situation will cause my physical responses to shut down in a heartbeat. What a wide variety of human responses there are and it was interesting to read a different point of view. That's one of the best things about reading blogs here. Thanks... Not all who wander are lost.
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8/10/2006 11:38 am |
Pleasure in itself brings about pain. The pleasure of seeing a newborn baby for the first time brings a twinge of pain as I remember my own. Pleasure ..pain..it's all apart of being human. Buttery Delight
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8/10/2006 1:15 pm |
I had always been agaisnt giving or receiving pain as there is enoughpain in the world already - spo why create more? But the last woman I was with changed that a bit. She liked being restrianed and spanked and hard on occasion. At first it wasn't easy for me to do, but then it became more of a job. I would watch carefully and apply just the right force. When I would enter her body - she would be far more senstized and her orgazms where often very strong. Now I think the way to go (in these cases) would be to switch places to keep the balance. It is better to give than recieve doens't seem to measure up here. Could you see yourself "giving" or only "receiving"
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8/10/2006 8:23 pm |
Well.... I have to go along with ya ... ya know I'm a (Diva In Training) The reason I know this, it says so on my profile. I'll all about studies, resources, experiences, friends and being open enough to know the difference. What two people bound together as a couple, that is trust and that's the key to pleasure pain. I'm still under the weather with my earache. I'm sorry Sis. I'll do better tomorrow. warm huggies 2ya
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You cannot conceive the many without the one.
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For myself...it is! i get to a point where i feel disconected, and the pain seems to reconect my inner and outer emotions. Too long without and on the sexual realm...i get depressed and insecure with the Dominants... i begin to wonder whats wrong... *sighs*
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